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Why does the feigned confidence look pathetic in the eyes of others?

The path to true self-esteem is through loyalty to yourself. But there is a popular belief among people that we should always appear strong and hide our fears, even with the help of feigned confidence. The harm that this “shared wisdom” does destroy our self-esteem.



Faked confidence does not raise self-esteem

Trying to show ourselves better than we really are, we give up our own “I” by wearing a mask. We behave this way because we are trying to control the opinions of others and avoid their disapproval. This is the main betrayal of oneself. The key to true self-esteem is to be on good terms with your inner world.

When we try to act as someone else, seeking recognition from others, we are not receiving self-esteem, but external evaluation. Because the goal of our actions is approval from outside. What do you think this will lead to? The longer this “acting performance” goes on, the further we move away from our nature. This is diametrically opposed to what we should actually do. Don’t be afraid to exploit your vulnerability!

What exactly does this “vulnerability” mean?

The word “vulnerability” should not be associated with weakness. Here, its meaning presupposes “openness”. Like all human beings, we are vulnerable. And this is absolutely normal. However, society’s standards require us to demonstrate our strength. So we have to hide our weaknesses. The sad irony is that the people we seek approval are likely to do the same thing. This behavior severely restricts our lives.

Why do we let ourselves be judged?

Why is it more important to us what others think about us than what we think about ourselves? When we underestimate our importance and value by making someone a judge, we are morally destroying ourselves. Other people have no right to judge us. So why appoint this authority? Everyone has their own opinion, but elevating someone else by allowing them to influence us is disrespectful to yourself. Understand that the only person who can judge you wears a black robe and presides over the courtroom.

We all want to be loved, but to be loved we have to be loved. When you pretend to be strong, you’re building a wall that keeps others out of your reach. On the contrary, others are attracted to openness. Feeling that a person is as vulnerable as they are, people around them want to take care of them. Isn’t that a paradox? We hide what ultimately attracts people and makes them love us.

Accepting our weaknesses makes us truly strong. After all, a whole chain of specific events in our lives and a set of choices that we had to make led to this result.

Source: https://flytothesky.ru/

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